Selfishness in Pregnancy

Wednesday, 3 August 2016

In this pregnancy, I have become really selfish.
All I have wanted to do is cross stitch, chill out at home, go out for lunch with Sam and hang out with my family. Apparently that is selfish. I have been 'neglecting' social media. I still scroll through my instagram feed and check snapchats and stuff but only quickly and mostly while on the toilet (not gunna lie. As if you don't do it too). I just don't like picking up my phone anymore. I realised that I had become so attached to my phone and didn't want to carry a bad habit into motherhood. I found that I was opening instagram, scrolling through everything, closing the app and then reopening it right away without thinking. I had to stop!

Since my work contract finished up a couple of months ago (a bit earlier than I had expected), I knew I needed to use this time for me exclusively. I don't know how motherhood will change me and the way that my routines work and the things that I'll do in the day so I figured I had to use the time before baby is here to be as gluttonous for relaxation as possible. So far it has been absolutely fucking amazing. I went through a period in my life where I was unemployed for a while and I got so bored and restless that I became severely depressed. I feared that would happen again this time and not having a job or any real responsibilities would make me go crazy, but it has been the complete opposite. I take my sweet time with anything I do right now and it's just super refreshing not feeling rushed or pressured. I know this may all change once baby is here so I'll try not to get too used to it but for now I'm enjoying the selfishness.

As I said, I haven't been too present on social media, and I don't know how present I will be in the future, so we'll just have to see how we go.

Til next time...